“When it rains, it pours, maybe the art of life is to convert tough times to great experiences: We can choose to hate the rain or dance in it.” – Joan Marques 

Are you a carrot, an egg, or a coffee bean? “When adversity knocks on your door, and when you are faced with life’s challenges, how do you respond?

I am going to tell you a story, a story about perspective, and it goes like this:

A young woman went to her mother and told her about her life and how things were so hard for her.  She did not know how she was going to make it and wanted to give up.  She was tired of fighting and struggling.  It seemed as one problem was solved a new one arose.
Her mother took her to the kitchen.  She filled three pots with water.  In the first, she placed carrots, in the second she placed eggs, and the last she placed ground coffee beans.
She let them sit and boil without saying a word.  In about twenty minute she turned off the burners.  She fished the carrots out and placed them in a bowl.  She pulled the eggs out and placed them in a bowl.  Then she ladled the coffee into a bowl.  Turning to her daughter, she asked, “Tell me what you see?”
“Carrots, eggs, and coffee,” she replied.
She brought her closer and asked her to feel the carrots.  She did and noted that they were soft.  She then asked her to take an egg and break it.  After pulling off the shell, she observed the hard-boiled egg.  Finally, she asked her to sip the coffee.  The daughter smiled, as she tasted its rich aroma.
The daughter then asked, “What’s the point, mother?”
Her mother explained that each of these objects had faced the same adversity… boiling water – but each reacted differently.  The carrot went in strong, hard, and unrelenting.  However, after being subjected to the boiling water, it softened and became weak.  The egg had been fragile.  Its thin outer shell had protected its liquid interior.  But, after being through the boiling water, its inside became hardened.  The ground coffee beans were unique, however.  After they were in the boiling water they had changed the water.
“Which are you?” she asked the daughter.  “When adversity knocks on your door, how do you respond?  Are you a carrot, an egg, or a coffee bean?”

Ask yourself in which situations do I tend to become an egg, a carrot or a coffee bean? How do I react when facing a life crisis?

Are you the egg who has a soft heart and a flexible approach but following the loss of someone dear, illness, a break up or a financial crisis have you changed into someone bitter and tough with a hardened heart?

Or are you a carrot, who seems very strong from the outside but following a life crisis do you fade and become soft and lose your strength?

Or are you like the coffee bean which acts upon life situations, adapt easily and when things are at their worst, you stay focused and positive, and evaluate your perspectives? Do you use the source of pain itself to elevate yourself to another level?

Which one are you?

No person is either as happy or unhappy as they imagine, things are never as good or as bad as they seem. We all face difficult situations in life, however you need to believe that you grow through tough times and you become a better version of yourself.  Always remember there is grace in being where you are, it may not feel like it, however in every crisis there is a hidden gift for you, you just have to dig a bit and search for it.

Train your mind to re-frame any event in your life by giving it a different meaning, this helps you change your perspective which is a key to overcome adversity.
“Life is not the way it is supposed to be, it is the way it is. The way you cope with it is what makes the difference” – Virginia Satir.
Linda Chaccour
Founder Emerge Coaching
Life Strategist and Happiness Consultant